THE INCREDIBLE STORY OF CALIGULA'S HORSE AND THE NINETY PLEBIANS
(Document assigned #000.6)
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Caligula was out one day, riding through the forest.  A band of
plebians (90, in fact) approached.

"Please," said the leader of the plebians. "We are very hungry.
Could you spare us a few coins for some food?"

Caligula scoffed at the hungry peasants and turned to ride on.
However, suddenly the trusty mount was surrounded on all sides by
the plebians...

"You may go," said the leader.  "But we must eat.  Your horse will
be our meal."  The peasants were now bearing knives.

Caligula ran away for dear life.

"YUM!" shouted the leader, as he warmed the fire.
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The Fire Escape:  A Classical retreat for your existential haddocks.